01110111 01101111 01101101 01100101 01101110
Posted on December 19, 2006
Filed Under Asides, chancers, computers, interweb, not funny, Rant, work | Comments Off
The I.T. department rang me today and left a voicemail that they wanted to talk to me about my dial-up internet useage. ‘Here’s my direct number, he said, ‘call me‘.
Oh sugar, I thought. I always knew my secret obsession with Meg Ryan would catch me out in the end*. I didn’t fancy losing my job just before Christmas so I didn’t return his call immediately. Instead I called into the nearest McDonalds and bought myself a premium grande Americano coffee (English: large coffee with milk). I needed to think about my situation before I returned the call. Maybe I could blame it on trojans, spyware, viruses, or whatever you’re having yerself?
It turns out there’s two ways of getting into my company’s intranet. One is dial-up and the other is via broadband/vpn. They want to phase out the dial-in option because it’s not very secure. I have an account for the dial-in (who knew?), as well as the more secure vpn option. They want to delete as many dial-in accounts as they can, ‘So would I mind awfully if…?‘.
I know the guy and we swapped a few jokes etc. Turns out everyone is okay with the idea except for one person who insists on keeping the dial-in option. And who is that person? Only the head of the I.T. dept who doesn’t have broadband at home. ‘Shirley shome misthake‘, I said. ‘No‘, came the deadpan reply. Hmm!
Since this post is going in circles (from 0 to 1 and back again, if you will), here’s another pretty (talented) woman (Tori Amos).
These two photos and our computer policy are connected in a very tenuous way. These two photos are so old (on my computer, anyway) that their file names are megryan.jpg and toriamos.jpg instead of [meg_ryan.jpg] and [tori_amos.jpg]. Back in the day, computers couldn’t handle empty spaces in file names!
* I don’t have a Meg Ryan obsession! I just simply don’t keep many pics of ‘famous’ people on my computer. I don’t see the point in looking at ‘imaginary’ people on a computer (or Reality TV, for that matter) when you can just simply walk outside your front door and experience lots of extra-ordinary real people.
Corrie, Eastenders, Home And Away etc would fall into this category as well.
Fin [The End]
P.S.
women converts to (binary):
01110111 01101111 01101101 01100101 01101110
‘women are not computers’ converts to (binary):
01110111 01101111 01101101 01100101 01101110 00100000 01100001 01110010 01100101 00100000 01101110 01101111 01110100 00100000 01100011 01101111 01101101 01110000 01110101 01110100 01100101 01110010 01110011
I chose the first option for my blog post!
